Pieces of CrAPP

what do we do when gobs of plutonium pits are uncovered from an old nuclear weapons production facility? we develop around it and/or turn it into a wildlife refuge and tell everyone that everything is just dandy. that’s what we do. yay America!

Its called Rocky Flats and its just outside of Denver. here’s some info for your eyeballs.

And so this was an assignment for an editorial…its a photograph of the original (watercolor/acrylic), thus the resolution is not as clear. I have it scanned on another computer, which i may or may not upload later. ho hum. 

Its beautiful outside! go play! watch out for toxic waste!

We were assigned to illustrate the generation gap. It was an in-class assignment but i actually finished it in the hospital. there is a more detailed story that goes with it, although the story and the drawing sorta happened independent of each other. that is to say, neigher one inspired the other. if you care to hear the story, please read on….. i find it entertaining, but then….i wrote it.

“toot toot” - ah, the sound of my own horn. 

here’s the story

There are several people i know that suffer from what I consider to be a very real disorder in which they believe that goats are not only earthly creatures, but that they are *gag* cute (i just threw up in my mouth a little). You’ve all been had. Goats are NOT cute, they’re demonic, and i have reason to believe they were placed here by aliens who plucked them from a place that resembles hell. I won’t pretend to know what effect this delusion will have on your health but I DO know what effect it has on the health of the planet. They are classified as invasive on many islands, including the Galapagos, Hawaii, and also some such islands off the coast of California, to name a few. lets stop splitting hairs and just classify them accordingly: Invasive on earth. They are, indeed, listed at #17 out of 100 of the worlds worst invasive species, behind a couple of insects, some plants, and several types of fungus. That means goats are #1 worst invasive MAMMAL on this planet. gross. 

What can save us? i don’t know, and frankly i think if you’re a goat fan its already too late for you. replacing the goat with a sheep in the chinese calendar would definitely be a step in the right direction. I’m trying to work with chinese scholars to put this into effect, but so far I haven’t had any of my calls returned.  2012, year of the water sheep? yes please. 

Recently got this crappy little piece into a group art show. The theme was ninjas. I’ve found in the process that when trying to create something to fit into a particular show, you get really creative ideas for everything BUT that particular theme. Ninjas in boats? Sure, there’s a connection there. I just haven’t figured it out yet.

more playing with collage to illustrate an age-old adage.

“a dandelion without petals is a wandering sasquatch”?  well, Not quite…….

in-class assignment:  mental disorder- body dysmorphic disorder. collage, pastel.

side note: If i were team captain, i’d take the crazy, the strange, the wild, and the weird, any day. Its the ordered ones that freak me out. and they’re no good at dodgeball. 

Purple.  High fives to anyone who can figure out who these dudes are (and preemptive high fives to the lovely Halley Roberts who is going to be helping me with color theory).

“If I had a world of my own, everything would be nonesense (sic), nothing would be what it is, since everything would be what it isn’t & contrary to what it is it wouldn’t be, & contrary to what it wouldn’t be it would, you see?”  ~ Alice in Wonderland.

This is one of my favorite quotes of all time. We are a people obsessed with answers, hungry for “understanding”….. often at the expense of a good time. Have you ever been at a bar with a friend who wants to discuss the mechanism in which alcohol stimulates a ubiquitous, stress-linked biochemical cascade to send whatsit molecules into the nuclei of whoseits neurons, which in turn stimulates the transcription of thingymabobs genes (having presumably deleterious effects)? Yeah, no fun. Why can’t beer just be magic?? Bartenders be Wizards?? 

I like questions that don’t have answers. because then I’m not responsible to answer them. Try asking me what my name is and i might tell you it begins with an “X”……

collective isolation.

(in flight sketch)